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Tag: Fic

I have this idea for a clopfic…

Should I write it?

All right! Wow, it’s been over a year since my last erotic literature review. I’ve decided to finally do another one because I’m on FimFiction now! Okay, that was originally for editing (and it still is), but I decided I should use it to keep track of clopfics.

I’m going to change the format of my reviews, starting with this one. Rather than doing a “play-by-play” sort of thing, I’ll give general comments, while highlighting some specific parts for detailed commentary (you know, like a normal review XD). Editorial comments will still be a “play-by-play,” but those will go on my editing blog. (I don’t have that for this story yet, but I’ll update. UPDATE: Editorial comments are up on Google Drive!)

(Review after the break.)

This particular story comes from an old mini-discussion about Ambris’s love for Twidash (futa Twi, to be specific). Thanks! (By the way, my personal recommendation for a non-alicorn-related futa Twilight x Dash clopfic is “Volume Seven”. It’s pretty quickly paced, though.)

All right, let’s get to the actual review. This premise of princesses getting endowed with male genitalia is, as you might expect one to say, rather strange. I really don’t find any reasoning behind it, and the story doesn’t really give any. But that’s the conflict, a central part of any a good story, so let’s go with it.

I’m not too impressed by the whole “Playfilly” thing. Sure, it’s an interesting explanation for how she knows what stallions’ anatomy looks like, but later it’s revealed that she’s been with one before. The fact that she has doesn’t really add anything to the story, in my view, so I think it would be better to just take that part out.

I absolutely loved the progression of the story. At first I wasn’t sure how things would go in terms of “heat,” but that concern was alleviated.

Honestly, I didn’t like the climax (both literary and sexual). Sure, it was “hot,” but it was just. Way. Too. Long. A lot of detail was put into the buildup, which is consistent with Twilight learning how to handle her new anatomy herself. But the cumshot descriptions seemed out of place, and right around the fourth shot I started wondering if it was put in just for the sex. The part after that was actually hot and consistent with the story. Maybe someone else should write the continuation. XD


I’m concerned about grammar and all that, and I enjoy a well-edited piece of erotic writing. Here’s where I’ll post advice for writers of that sort, as well as for writers in general. I’ll even take requests there.




guy:~pants heavily as I let out a loud and long groan. my body tensing as my shaft erupts with cum. I flood your insides and pull out slowly to look down at the mess I made.~ oh no. looks like we’ll have to get you all cleaned up. but first, you need to clean me.

<3 PP




There was no conscious decision at any point when drawing those, so I’m not sure. It just came out that way.

I’ve definitely read some of those fics so it could be that it’s simply affected my subconcious.

I’ve also mentioned in the past one of the reasons I like futa is the ability to viscerally identify with a penis. And FutaTwi on Dash is probable my subconscious expressing how badly I wanna boink Dash.


I think my personal favorite is The Benefits of Princesshood. It’s only one chapter and doesn’t show any signs of ever updating, BUT THE LAST SCENE IS REALLY DAMN HOT.

I recommend it.


EDIT: I finally read it. Check out my review.





My rules give some explanation. (Everyone reads my rules, right? XD Maybe I should link to them everytime I mark “RULES VIOLATION" or “RULES WARNING”.)

Anyway, my first encounter with incest in furry (not exactly pornographic) was in “Better Days,” a webcomic by furry artist Jay Naylor. The chapter I linked is where it happens (or is heavily implied, anyway). That was probably my main turn-off to incest in pornography.

More generally, sexual reproduction between closely-related individuals is disadvantageous in natural selection, because it does not create as much genetic diversity. So there is a biological reason for avoiding incest, which could lead (justifiably, in my opinion) to the cultural avoidance of it.

However, I think incest has more to do with the relationship between the individuals. Adoptive siblings are not closely related biologically, but I would still consider sex between them incest. Family relationships (I think) are asexual (going back to the biological advantage), and since the relationship between adoptive children and other members of a family is about the same, I would still consider it incest (and thus wrong to some degree).

Now the Celestia-Luna exception. You might be referring to this post, in which I mention the exception; I also mention it in my rules. In the rules, I point to a clopfic, "Tipsy” by Anonymous Pegasus on FIMFiction, whose handling of the incest desensitizes it a bit to the cultural taboo.

More generally, I make the exception because, frankly, Celestia and Luna have a pretty flimsy claim for being “sisters.” All we have for that is the first episode, but there’s no history of their birth, their parents, or their childhood. (I doubt that they’re even sisters in the traditional biological sense.) Like I said, I think incest is about the relationship, so the fact that there isn’t much of this relationship between Celestia and Luna makes it seem less like incest than if the “sister” claim is taken on its face.

“Flimsy logic”? Come on!

I’ll admit that that was my initial reaction, but now I’ll respectfully disagree. Maybe I should elaborate by starting with the clopfic I referenced:

Luna lifted a socked hoof to touch at her own chest, turning to face Twilight properly. “Thou understands [sic] that our sister and we are many, many years old?”

Twilight nodded at that, tilting her head to the side slightly. “I know that it’s over two thousand years old.”

“Then thou knows [sic] that we do not have…parents, as it were?” Luna continued, raising a brow.

The young unicorn frowned at that, and then nodded again. “Indeed.”

“Our sister and we are close. We are closer than family. We are like the sun and the moon itself. We sisters, but we are alien to each other. There is no family between us except that which we choose to acknowledge,” Luna explained, giving Twilight a warm smile. “We are sisters…but we are not.”

Works for me!

I see a lot of fan work that depicts Celestia and Luna as fillies, but none of that is canonical. This is opposed to the other family relations depicted on the show (the Apple family, and Twilight Sparkle and Shining Armor), which actually have canonical childhood histories and parents. We don’t even know who Celestia and Luna’s parents are, or even if they have parents.

This ambiguous childhood relationship also explains why I’m okay with Celestia x Cadenza, even though according to the “wedding announcement” in the New York Times they’re aunt and niece; Celestia and Cadenza also don’t have much (if any) canonical family history.

Alright, I can accept that as one valid fanon interpretation. I got the impression you were trying to assert that something more canon. but reviewing your posts, I understand better what you actually meant.

I’m not seeing the scene you guys are talking about. I think it’s kinda sweet

To which scene are you referring? All the scenes are linked, but if you don’t feel like following the discussion up:

  • The scene in the furry webcomic “Better Days” is in Chapter 10, starting with the comic dated 24 September 2004.
  • The scene in the clopfic “Tipsy” is in Chapter 3 (“Twilunestia”) and can be found with your browser’s “find” feature. The word “parents” appears only in the part I quoted.